Here's to the Beginning!

So. In the last few years, a ton of "weight loss shows" have been dominating our television sets. EVERYWHERE we turn, there's a new product that will make you thinner or a workout that will get you into shape...all in a ridiculous amount of time. It's hard to ignore these advertisements telling me "YOU ARE LARGE!"

All of my life, like a lot of "contestants" say, I have struggled with my weight. The first times I noticed I was a bit on the larger side, was during middle school. It was and is hard to sit by and see, what seems like every other girl, look so pretty and confident compared to myself. Over the years or middle and high school, I didn't become more confident so to speak, but you could say I thought I had "came to terms" with how I looked. That was essentially a lie. So I have basically been internally torturing myself with lies and delusions.

Things only got worse when I got to college. The stress of school, homesickness, and throw in a bit of loneliness and give me some weight gain! I got home for the summer and was devastated. Like literally. It was horrifying. But my second year I vowed to change. The first semester I went to the gym like 3-5 times a week and ate pretty much the same, not great but not horrible. At winter break I was pretty broken up about not seeming to have changed, in numbers or looks. I was determined to take my life under control. This last spring semester I was crazy, I went to the gym 2 times a day 5 days a week! That's 10 times a week! Over the 16 weeks of school I went over 150 times! And even though my delusional mind doesn't see a change, I have lost 15 pounds, which means that if I really want to change, I CAN!

What inspired this "tell all" blog, was the new Extreme Makeover show (I know, yet again a TV show is influencing me!). the girl on it was 21 years old and 369 pounds! Well I'm no where near that, but sometimes I feel like it. One of the things I took from the episode was motivation, which isn't a new concept or anything, but it helped urge me to set a big goal for myself and I'm going to keep the momentum I built going and try harder to become who I always have felt I could be.

It's time to start believing in myself...

So here;s to the beginning of the beginning!

-Holly